Examine my heart

Examine my heart
My pride
When I look around, I stop looking at Christ
When I think about judging and my pride, God always reminds me of Phil 1:27 “Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ.” I know my life doesn’t match up to the weight of gospel, when I am not comparing myself to Christ alone.
This was and still is my prayer, that God would allow me to look at Him and only Him, and that I would be willing to give more regardless of people around me, because He gave it all for me.

Acts 5:41 “The apostles left he Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name”
Why do I complain?
We deserve nothing,. In fact, we are told that we WILL, not might, suffer for the gospel. Where do I (especially as an American) get the mentality that I deserve comfort?
I pray that God would give me the power to start living that way.
I praise You, you are a God who forgives.

Ps. 27
V4 ONE THING I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple
V8 My heart says of you “SEEK HIS FACE!” Your face Lord I will seek
V13 I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living
V14 WAIT for the Lord, be strong and take heart and WAIT for the Lord.